My Coveted Parts
This morning, I was at the gym. My iPod blasting and my brow sweating, I stretched my hamstrings and brought the funk to 24 Hour Fitness.
Suddenly, there was a tap on my shoulder. I looked around. Nobody. I continued stretching. Another tap. I looked again, and this time spotted a very small woman speaking silently up at me.
I held up my finger in the "one moment please" gesture as I wrestled to shut off my my iPod.
Me: Yes?
Small woman: (English was not her first language) How you get that butt?
Me: Pardon me?
Small woman: How you get that butt? (she gestures to her butt, then mine) I like and want to make that butt.
A-hem. I'm sorry; I don't do that in the gym. Then, it dawned on me that she was asking me how to make her butt as large and round as my own. A-ha!
I showed her some exercises I do that work those muscles. She, in turn, showed me, once again, her flat butt. I smiled and nodded. So did she. I smiled again. She stood there, staring and smiling, until eventually, I went back to stretching, and she wandered away.
It's a weird little moment in itself, but this is all on top of the fact that a woman at work, also small and foreign in the same way as the above-mentioned woman, keeps patting me on the butt and saying, "Oh, I like your butt! I want to have butt like that!"
I'm not quite sure what to make of this phenomenon. I'm scared to go to Chinatown alone.
Suddenly, there was a tap on my shoulder. I looked around. Nobody. I continued stretching. Another tap. I looked again, and this time spotted a very small woman speaking silently up at me.
I held up my finger in the "one moment please" gesture as I wrestled to shut off my my iPod.
Me: Yes?
Small woman: (English was not her first language) How you get that butt?
Me: Pardon me?
Small woman: How you get that butt? (she gestures to her butt, then mine) I like and want to make that butt.
A-hem. I'm sorry; I don't do that in the gym. Then, it dawned on me that she was asking me how to make her butt as large and round as my own. A-ha!
I showed her some exercises I do that work those muscles. She, in turn, showed me, once again, her flat butt. I smiled and nodded. So did she. I smiled again. She stood there, staring and smiling, until eventually, I went back to stretching, and she wandered away.
It's a weird little moment in itself, but this is all on top of the fact that a woman at work, also small and foreign in the same way as the above-mentioned woman, keeps patting me on the butt and saying, "Oh, I like your butt! I want to have butt like that!"
I'm not quite sure what to make of this phenomenon. I'm scared to go to Chinatown alone.
posted by Bert at 5:54 PM
2 Comments:
lol!!!!
i love that little Asian woman! can you imagine the moxie it takes to walk up to a stranger (in a strange land!) and ask a question like that? then again, having been to china, i know it probably takes nothing because you're just born that way over there. matter of fact, pushy and open, that is.
you should have sat her down and told her that you need to have Scandinavian grandparents to get nice round booties like ours. you can't get it from working out!
well, it IS a nice butt...
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