Girl Etiquette #1

Apparently, a tea length bridesmaid's dress is one that is hemmed at mid-calf. A cocktail length bridesmaid's dress is one that is hemmed slightly higher, at the knee.

This distinctness in terminology is, no doubt, meant to differentiate between the respectable, modest women who drink tea and eat harmless biscuits, and the shameless hussies and harlots who drink cocktails and don't mind showing a little kneecap now and again.

Also apparent... I will soon find myself standing under fluorescent lights before a three-way mirror (the cruel kind where you can come face to face with your own butt) and trying on many variations of both types of dresses. I'm betting I end up with cocktail length. I am truly a hussy and a harlot at heart.